When my friend asked if I was interested in writing an article, before I even asked about the topic, I said, “yes.” It’s funny as words naturally come easy for me, though sadly, I am on yet another rewrite. Why? I suppose, in many ways, it is because I’m equally as awestruck as I am intimidated by you. You see, for me, this journey started simply as a novel way to eliminate debt from my life – I’m grateful, humbled and I hope my ideas in this piece bring you value.
So, after I said “yes” my friend then shared the topic for the article, which gave me pause, but then made me smile. While I am not an authority, I feel I have much to share. It’s funny, as the topic is quite contradictory. On the one hand, you’ve got to bring someone close, but on the other hand, you have to push them away. It’s like, “I love you, but I don’t love you.”, “sorry, not sorry” - I mean, a quality relationship maintained at arm’s length? No way….or….way?
Way. All the way. You see, it starts with the creator setting boundaries. When you say the word boundary, most people will look at the word as a dirty word (and not that kind of dirty word)! The truth is people need boundaries as boundaries set expectations and create order. And with expectations and order, there is understanding and calm, allowing beautiful things to blossom. Now it doesn’t have to be just flowery and flowing language; what I say easily translates into real life.
Have you ever waited twenty minutes to get a bartender’s attention? We all have. If a place is popular, patience will most likely be required. And it is not because the bartender doesn’t want to get to you quickly; it’s more because there are others in line before you and the bartender is busy. As a customer, you naturally understand; you wait your turn, get your drink, and enjoy a great night.
In the same spirit, to achieve the same results, which is a great night, both for the customer and the bartender, I’ve modeled the same approach. When someone joins my free fan pages, the customer is met with an automated message and an analogy – the busy bartender. This approach allows me to set expectations and establish boundaries at the very beginning.
By clearly defining your expectations as a creator, your customer can respond. Will they respect your boundaries, will they test your boundaries, or will they walk away? If the person pushes your boundaries, you have an immediate opportunity to exercise the block button, and if they walk away, oh well – it wasn’t meant to be. But should the person respect your boundaries, you and your customer will appreciate the other, which is the first foundational step towards building a quality relationship.
Look, this isn’t easy, and burnout is real. While not comprehensive, the approach I’ve outlined is the path I’ve taken to this point. As a no-face creator, I’ve sold over 16.5K videos on a top clip site and made it as high as the top 1.7% on a top fan site. I’ve done this by being consistent with quality content, being honest and authentic, and knowing that existing fans are just as crucial as cultivating new ones and that none of this is possible without them. If you give respect, you will often get respect and if someone doesn’t return the respect you give, block them.
In closing, quality customer relationships are not bought or forced; they blossom organically. The one tip I would leave you with is to be the best you and conduct your “business” ethically, allowing you to look at yourself in the mirror at the end of the day and still like what you see. While my fans all know I want their money, they know I want their fun money, not their real-life money. I don’t want the money that will keep them from paying a bill or feeding their family – I don’t have the appetite. And trust me, if you conduct yourself accordingly, your fans and customers will notice and appreciate you for it. Look, we’re all trying to make it in this world in our own way, and I’m a big believer that even in naughty places, we can still be good to each other.
